Handymania: Woodworking

My previous narrative post began with me maniacally painting my way to insanity and ended with me sleeping it off–and then with me hinting at a relapse.  And so we continue…

After a good night’s rest, I awoke to the rest of our boxes to unpack.  Mainly, these boxes were filled with books, which didn’t have bookshelves yet, so I couldn’t unpack those.  I then eyed two boxes of CD’s: Perfect! All of the CD’s are in racks–all I need to do is find a place to put them.  But there was no place to put them.  No place to put them.  What am I to do?  On-and-off throughout the day I tried to answer this question.  My handymania began to kick in again as I was lying in bed awake: I dreamed up some imaginary blueprints and decided to make a trip to Home Depot the next day.  Before I knew it, this was my situation:

(My verbal ambiguity should give you a clue as to my working knowledge of woodworking.)  Using only primitive tools (i.e. hand tools), a power drill, sloppy geometry, and my intuition, my manic dream began to materialize:

"What am I even doing..." was a thought I had on repeat.

“What am I even doing…” was a thought I had on repeat.

Shoot.  I accidentally made a fence.

Shoot. I accidentally made a fence.

Good: the CD case works. Bad: the CD case is massive.

*Test Run*
Good: It works.
Bad: It’s massive–must revise.
(FYI, because I was using a miter box [used to accurately saw angles manually] without the capability to saw certain angles, I only sawed 45 & 90 degree angles, which resulted in the beast pictured, jutting out 4 feet from the wall.  Since neither Chelsea nor I were happy with its size, I revised by attempting to cut a few different angles myself using some old-school techniques; this resulted in some pretty janky [but workable] results that reduced the size of the structure.)

Not equipped with proper clamps or a bench, I had to improvise.

Not equipped with proper clamps or bench, I had to improvise.

Surprisingly, the placeholder stood strong (until I bumped my head on it).

Surprisingly, this placeholder stood strong (until I bumped my head on it).

Eight 2×4’s, five 1×3’s, dozens of screws, one broken drill bit, a sawdust-ridden bedroom floor, and a few marathon sessions of woodworking later, my CD case was complete.  Minus a few sloppy angle measurements and the overall unsoundness of the structure, I feel pretty good about the result–I think it could have turned out much worse if I had less luck.  Without further ado, I present to you the culmination of my mania:

"CD Case" by Chad Ryan

“CD Case” by Chad Ryan

It can hold 500+ CD's.

It can hold 500+ CD’s.

The craziest thing about all of this is that I still buy CD's.

The craziest thing about all of this is that I still buy CD’s.

Now, for the dramatic finish to my mania: it took ahold of my subconscious.  Evidently, I accidentally built a doorstop (which we were in need of) while I was building the CD case:

Oddly, this remnant of my mania functions better than the CD case.

Oddly, this remnant of my mania fulfills its function better than the CD case fulfills its.

The doorstop in action.

It was actually just a piece of scrap wood.

I hope none of you reach the end of this mini-saga believing that I am actually manic–I just got really excited about trying these new handyman activities, and I thought that portraying myself in a downward spiral of insanity would somehow make my furniture-painting and CD-case-making an exciting thing to read about.  In reality, I really enjoyed painting & woodworking.  I had never really done either of these things, and so diving into them has given me the confidence that I actually am capable of doing handy things around the home.  Except for plumbing–I’m gonna leave that one to the plumbers.

shoes & blues,
Chad

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